Wednesday, December 21, 2011

OMG! YAY! I'm so excited!!!


Years & years ago I learned that my best friend was unable to have children.  While she was pregnant with her first child her very abusive ex-husband, to put it mildly, stomped her into labor when she was 7 months pregnant, end result being a hysterectomy when she was only about 19 years old and the loss of her son.  I learned about this about 7 years ago.

At the time that I'd learned about it I was a single mom to Mikeal with no plans of settling down anytime soon & no plans of having any more children as a result, for quite some time.  She & I tentatively made a deal that I would be a surrogate mother for her, after her now, wonderful, fianceé was ready.  He drug his feet, was overseas for a while (Army related), I moved away, moved back, then ended up getting engaged to Brian & pregnant with married, yada yada... Which threw a new curve in the mix because we not only had to get her fianceé to go along/agree/be ready for it, but Brian had to also be on board.

Finally everything fell into place.  Last October (in 2010) Brian approached the subject with me...I'd not even mentioned it in months, if not a year or two...and said he was on board with me being a surrogate for them.  Surprisingly within days the fianceé was also on board with it.  We started researching, I worked to get my stupid hormone crap under control (it's still not there), but our real hang-up was money.  They live in Texas.  We live in Tennessee.  He has a strict work schedule & I just don't have the money to make the trip out there to be impregnated, especially if it didn't take the first time around.

Anyways...skip along to a couple of weeks ago...

They have a baby in the baking process that they are planning on adopting.  The parents are quite young, she's only 20, the daddy is only maybe 22, if that...and they already have a 3 year old & 5 month old.  She lost her job not too terribly long ago, thus resulting in losing their health insurance, that was paying for the birth control, thus resulting in this new baby.  He just works as a dishwasher at this time.  I don't know all the details of how my friend & this couple ran across each other, but this young couple is intent on putting the new baby up for adoption since they are unable to afford him/her....and unable to afford to get an abortion even. 

Medical law states that a woman is unable to get her tubes tied until after she has either had 3 children or is over the age of 21.  Insurance 80% of the time doesn't even pay for birth control...and without insurance birth control is nearly equal to a light bill on a monthly basis.  Also, when you live in a Republican ran state services like Planned Parenthood - where birth control is often provided for free or at a very low cost - are unavailable...but you can still get an abortion under the right circumstances, aka with enough money...

Anyways...the baby is due June 18th and I'm absolutely over the moon for them!  I know they're going to be awesome parents and are two of the most deserving folks I know.  I'd still happily be a surrogate/egg donor for them if the road ever leads to that direction in the future.  For now though I'm just as happy with being Aunty Stephi!  ♥  ♥

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